Monday, December 13, 2004

bizarro phizz

inspired by this - the scariest thing i've. ever. seen.

clay aiken is bizarro phizz. he is the complete opposite of everything i am and/or try to be. i don't wear pastels. i can't sing. if i could sing there would be no chance i would ever subject myself to the american idol trials. and didn't he only come in second? i pride myself on never having seen an episode.

other ways i am the opposite of clay aiken:

  • i like sex with girls
  • i don't wear sweaters
  • my christmas special would never be on nbc
  • i would have taken out reuben's kneecaps way before the finals ( jeff gillooly where are you?)
  • i don't speak with a southern drawl
  • i don't find cabbage patch kids sexually arousing
  • i can grow facial hair
  • my penis exists

album of the jour: chicklet indian summer

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