some of these are funny

Things you'd love to say out loud at work:

I can see your point, but I still think you're full of shit.

I don't know what your problem is, but I'll bet it's hard to
pronounce.

How about never? Is never good for you?

I'm really easy to get along with once you people learn to see it my way.

I'll try being nicer if you'll try being smarter.

I'm out of my mind, but feel free to leave a message.

I don't work here. I'm a consultant.

I like you. You remind me of myself when I was young and stupid.

You are validating my inherent mistrust of strangers.

I have plenty of talent and vision; I just don't give a damn.

I will always cherish the initial misconceptions I had about you

The fact that no one understands you doesn't mean you're an artist.

Any connection between your reality and mine is purely
coincidental.

What am I? Flypaper for freaks!?

I'm not being rude. You're just insignificant.

You know the acronym behind your name won't keep me from kicking your ass in the parking lot.

Do I look like a people person?

If I throw a stick, will you leave?

Too many freaks, not enough circuses.

Chaos, panic, & disorder - my work here is done.

How do I set a laser printer to stun?

I thought I wanted a career; turns out I just wanted a salary.

Who lit the fuse on your tampon?

Oh I get it... like humor... but different.


album du jour: steadman loser friendly