i've been coming up with responses to comments about weight gain, and i think the best way to deal with such observations is to chalk it up to whimsy. thus, i've conjured the following explanations to the remark "have you put on weight":
- yes i'm training for the nfl
- i was stung by a bee and i'm allergic
- i'm auditioning for a part in the porno version of "whale rider"
- i'm auditioning for a part in the beastiality film "whale ride her"
- i am making a documentary about the effects of eating only mcdonald's food for a month. what? fuck!!!
- i ate a baby (no idea)
- i'm pregnant (oh feel those kicks, he's gonna be a soccer player. he is... he iiissss...)
- trimspa baby!
- yes i'm starting to fill out quite nicely
- lay off me i'm starving
no those last couple aren't mine
album du jour: polara polara
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